How to Run Away from an Abusive Home

How to Run Away from an Abusive Home 

Leaving your home may be perfectly reasonable, such as if you feel seriously endangered, trapped with an abusive spouse, parent, or other family member. If all other attempts to resolve the situation calmly and peacefully have failed, here's how to get away from domestic violence safely. Never let anyone take advantage of you, if faced with a violent, abusive situation. 

Steps
1
Determine if your situation can be improved by contacting the police. While going to the police and pressing charges can be scary and painful, in many situations it is highly effective. Many people believe that the police can do nothing. This used to be true, but the laws are changing. Speak to domestic violence helpline about your local laws and the likelihood of a prosecution.
2
Understand why you're running away. Have you been thinking about running away for a long time, or has something triggered the thought? Maybe you're running away because of one really big argument you had with your parents or spouse; maybe you've done something you're ashamed of; maybe someone you live with beats you, or verbally assaults you on a regular basis. Whatever your reason, before you start packing up, determine if leaving really is the only option - there are ways to deal with problems besides running away. You are probably very scared and confused, so do not make any decisions until you have calmed down. Once calm, sit and think about all your options - if running away really is the only way to go, then proceed.
3
Figure out what is stopping you from leaving. Often, an abusive person will use money, children, or pets to threaten the person they're abusing and prevent them from leaving. Don't overlook foster care for your children. It can be temporary, will put your children in a loving environment, and will make it even harder for the abuser to find them. Many programs care for pets of people fleeing abuse, but if you're not willing to leave your pets with them, consider leaving them with a trusted family member or friend.
4
Make a plan, and think of what you can do if any part of your plan goes wrong. Make up potential excuses for everything!
5
Find a place to relocate to where your abuser will not think to look. If you have a former boyfriend or girlfriend that you trust enough to keep a secret, go there.
Do not leave if you've nowhere to go. You will be out on the streets, with limited money and, perhaps, children to look after. You might find yourself involved in dangerous crimes and in horrible situations as you try to get by.
Consider where your abuser(s) will look, and avoid those places at all costs.
6
Don't keep any evidence of your plans at your house; if your plans are discovered, it will make escaping much more difficult in the long run.
7
Pick up a new identity. Consider changing your name, and everything else that makes you vulnerable to being tracked down, like your car, license plates, cell phone number, etc.
8
Pack any things that you may need and some cash; you may never be able to return back home.
9
Leave quietly and carefully, and make the person you're evading think that everything is as usual for as long as possible.
For example, leave at the beginning of a normal workday, so that your absence will not be noticed until the end of the workday, which gives you 8 hours (this amount can, and probably will, vary depending on your job) to make your move. If your abuser generally lets you have some social time after work with no consequences from them, say you are going out with a friend, buying you more time.
10
Notify the police department in your new neighborhood of your situation. Give them pictures of your abuser(s) so that they will know to be suspicious if that person shows up. Let your new neighbors know, also, if you feel comfortable doing so.
11
Take security measures in your new residence. Get an alarm system, lock your doors regularly, etc.
12
Always look over your shoulder; don't let down your guard. It's not the best way to live, but it's better than being stuck in an abusive situation.
13
Get a restraining order against the abuser. This is a first step in protecting yourself for life. If the abuser comes near you, calls you, e-mails you, they will be arrested. Your abuser will most likely fight this in court and try to place blame in you. If the situation arises where the judge may not issue a restraining order, ask for a dual restraining order, meaning neither of you can go near the other. Keep in mind that a restraining order is just a piece of paper, not a force field. Police cannot be in all places at all times.
14
If you feel your life is in danger, consider your options for personal protection.
For many people, a non-lethal option is the best choice. Residual emotional bonds between the abuser can make such options as pepper spray and stun devices a good choice. However, these require close contact to be used effectively, and in cases where drug use is likely, can be useless.
If you feel your life is in danger, consider buying a firearm for personal protection. If you do buy a firearm, get professional training; you can contact the NRA for a list of instructors in your area. In the U.S., if you intend to carry the weapon outside of your home, be sure to get the necessary permits and licenses. Civilian ownership of firearms is illegal in some countries, be sure to know your local laws & abide by them.

Source : http://www.wikihow.com/Run-Away-from-an-Abusive-Home

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